Grace - Fresh Vital Worship - Lent Blog 2007

happy easter - christ is risen!

Sat, 07 Apr 2007 23:03:00 +0000

Rosa

Sat, 07 Apr 2007 22:55:31 +0000

“It has been a sacrifice but Armonizar is my family and with their help and my faith in God, I have the courage and strength to believe that everything is possible”

These words were spoken by Rosa, a woman I met in Peru in early March.

Meeting her and her son Francis in early March, has been the dominant image for me, this Lent.

Rosa lives in desperate poverty in Lima, and her son Francis – pictured, was born not only with a cleft lip and palate but also a malformed face, due to a syndrome. She has been helped by Armonizar, an organisation which receives support from Transforming Faces Worldwide, a charity with which I am involved.

She is a single mother of two, without a supportive family, who has struggled ceaselessly to find treatment for Francis. She has used great ingenuity and determination against overwhelming odds, confronting an almost complete lack of provision or concern in the system. It took years for his palate to even be identified, let alone repaired but there are not even the facilities in the country to operate on some aspects of his condition. It will be difficult but it can happen.

Sometimes I feel, perhaps we all feel, that life can be overwhelming, a struggle to meet its challenges which keep coming, and don’t go away.

Rosa shows me what courage and faith in God can mean. Her words inspire and challenge me. Her faith calls out to mine and to others.

Lucas, one of the leaders of Armonizar told me, “when you give a little finger to God, he takes your whole arm”.

Jesus emerged from the desert, not just having had a time of reflection, but with a new purpose and direction.

Lent is over for the year – what new directions are waiting for you?

crucifixion

Fri, 06 Apr 2007 10:12:57 +0000

did jesus,
being god,
know that it would come out right?
as he stood,
his rigidity involuntary
did he know he had
a window in his diary
between friday and sunday,
brief and delimited,
for death?
did he know
that god was in his heaven,
in charge
in control
and that these present sufferings
counted as nothing?

or did jesus,
being human,
doubt?

as he hung there,
his life draining away,
did he face the abyss
and see himself
a speck,
beyond the attention of god?
did he reach the limit
of his self-
and his Self-belief?
did the idea
that he would save the world
appear the supreme egotism?
did the
fear
panic
abandonment
overwhelm him?
did he wish he’d settled down,
had a kid,
joined the family business
(the other family business)?
my god, my god, why have you forsaken me?

the unassumed is the unhealed
said gregory of nazianzus
(clever bloke).

i find the answer to these questions
when i look into myself
and see
poverty of faith
frailty of conviction
bare flickering of hope
and selfishness of ambition.
how could anyone save me
without taking these human experiences
and annealing them in the fire of god?

where, o death, is your sting?
close now.

Are you ready?

Wed, 04 Apr 2007 17:55:57 +0000

I finished work for the Easter break this evening and Easter Day is beginning to hover on the horizon. Lent is supposed to be a time of preparation - but am I ready. I still have a few days left - but as ever the temptation of empty days has been to fill them with people to see and things to do.

But on Sunday I will gather with a few others to celebrate the Resurrection and to share a meal. And whether I am ready or not God will be ready - and Easter will be here.

Enjoy The Space

Tue, 03 Apr 2007 22:04:27 +0000

It feels that the community in which I work is becoming increasingly, desperately, fanatically obsessed by making Christmas bigger, brighter and badder each year.
Easter, on the other hand, is generally ignored.
At times I enjoy the space this provides, at other times it just seems the wrong way around.

It's good when a little boy makes something that makes sense of it all to him and feeds many conversations.

This Easter...

Deep peace of the running wave to you;
deep peace of the flowing air to you;
deep peace of the quiet earth to you;
deep peace of the shining stars to you;
deep peace of the Son of Peace to you.

celtic blessing

Not Good Enough

Mon, 02 Apr 2007 23:02:47 +0000

I’m writing in a cold-induced stupor, with a heavy, wobbly, clogged-up head. Sparing any more gory detail, suffice it to say that the past few days of a cold have not put me in the reflective, spiritual, contemplative mood I wanted to cultivate during Holy Week.

I considered skipping my blog post, because I wasn’t up to it. I felt like I couldn’t come up with anything thoughtful enough, because all I want to do these days is curl up under a blanket and sleep or watch mindless television. And that doesn’t seem deep enough for Lent.

Suddenly I realised that that was the point. I didn’t feel good enough, able to perform well enough. I am not up to the task in front of me. That is the exact point of Lent. Our Lenten disciplines only serve to illustrate (especially for those of us who’ve failed in them) that Lent is not about being “good enough for God” once in the year.

All of our disciplines, self-examination, reflection, confession and penance are not points scored with God. Whether we succeed or fail in our Lenten disciplines, the point of them is not to prove to God that we are good enough. The love of God is not something we earn by being good enough. It has been given to us freely, when we have not earned or deserved it. God’s love for us is forever proven on the cross, in the events which we remember this week.

So, I write to remind myself not that I’m good enough, but that His love is constant. For tonight at least, I shall go to bed letting the comfort of God’s love push through my clogged head. What else would be different in my life if I stopped caring about being good enough?

Giggle-fit God

Sun, 01 Apr 2007 23:10:10 +0000

I read this recently and it made me smile:
“Long before he even began creation, God had us in mind, he had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love.
“Long, long ago he took the decision to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ. (He took such glee just in planning this!) He wanted us to enter into the celebration of his lavish gift – handed to us by his treasured Son.
“Because of Christ’s sacrifice we're a free people. We’re free of all the penalties and the punishments that we’ve chalked up over the years. And not just free by the skin of our teeth, but free beyond all doubt!
“He thought through every angle, made provision for every eventuality before he let us in on the plans which he took such delight in making (he almost had a giggle fit over the prospect of it all!)
“He set it all out before us in the person of Christ; it is a long-range plan, encompassing everything and summed up in Jesus. I’m talking about everything in deepest heaven and everything on planet earth.
“It's in Christ that we find out who we really are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got excited at the prospect of all this, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for a life of celebration, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone.
“It's in Christ that you, once you heard the truth and believed it, found yourselves home free - signed, sealed, and delivered by the Holy Spirit. This seal from God is only the first installment on what's coming; a constant reminder that we'll get everything God has planned for us, a whooping and glorious life.
“As well as thanking God for you, I ask the God of our leader, Jesus Christ, the God of glory—to make you intelligent and perceptive in knowing him personally, your eyes focused and clear, so that you can see exactly what it is he is calling you to do and grasp the immensity of this magnificent way of life he has for you, his followers. He is so extravagant with us who trust him, spending endless energy, which only goes to show how boundless his strength is!
“All this energy issues from Christ: remember that God raised him from death and set him on a throne in deep heaven, in charge of running the universe, everything from galaxies to governments, no name and no power exempt from his rule.
“And this is not just for the time being, but forever. He is in charge of it all, has the final word on everything.
“At the center of all this, Christ rules the church. The church, you see, is not peripheral to the world; the world is peripheral to the church.
“The church is Christ's body, in which he speaks and acts, by which he fills everything with his presence.”
Read it again outloud. It's great medicine.
[Continued in Ephesians 2]

Dream

Sun, 01 Apr 2007 19:53:15 +0000

Yann Arthus-Bertrand is probably best known for his Earth from the Air series of photographs which now number 500,000 taken in around 100 countries over a period of 10 years. But recently I’ve discovered his Six Billion Others project. He says, ‘Ten years spent flying above the planet have left their mark. Of course, the beauty of the Earth seen from the sky remains with me, but what impressed me most was the total lack of frontiers. There is a surprising contrast between the difficulties I encountered during the shooting in order to obtain flying permissions or cross borders with photographic equipment, and the immaterial character of such limits when seen from above. This land is for sharing, yet we fail to do so. This Earth is ours, it belongs to us all, but throughout the world, people are ready to die and to kill for a portion of it. Hence my obsession: I need to know why we cannot live together and coexist in harmony.’ He sent directors around the world to film people answering simple questions about life, happiness, dreams, childhood, love – the things that connect us all.

This film was created for New Year, but I have watched it many times since. As you would expect the dreams that people have are shaped by their experience of life. But I’m struck by how often the richest dreams are voiced by the poorest people. What is your dream?

Connections

Sat, 31 Mar 2007 20:23:58 +0000

I love making connections, particularly among people. It happens in my job as I learn names & faces & eventually put them all together – it gives me enormous satisfaction to figure out who people are & where they come from. Like when you meet someone new, start chatting & discover people or experiences in common – a connection is made.

This is the story of a recent inspirational connection I made.

When I was a little girl I lived in the United States and was fascinated by the early American history I learned. It influenced me a lot & one of my favourite pastimes was to go into the woods & play Indians. I gave myself wonderful names like Running Brook or Soaring Bird & imagined that I was a squaw who lived in these woods by my own fire – it was all very romanticised & apolitical but I was in my element. I developed a respect for the Native American people; their attitude of living in harmony with nature, their respect for the earth & its creatures, their art & their wisdom.

Fast forward 15 years & I found myself travelling extensively in Eastern Europe when there was still an Iron Curtain in place. Despite the suppression of religion at that time it was still possible to find remnants of the ancient Orthodox tradition. Wherever possible I would go into Orthodox churches, often small ones in remote villages, & it was there that I first discovered religious icons.

I thought they were beautiful but didn’t understand them & never felt personally inspired to worship with them – my connection with them was not complete – they were too far outside my culture zone.

Recently at Grace we were treated to a talk on traditional icons, their use in worship in pre-literate times, how they’re made, etc. It was really educational but still didn’t hit my “worship button”.

Shortly after that I came a cross a website which details a Native American couple’s work of introducing Jesus to their own people, within their own culture – making connections. (http://www.eagleswingsministry.com/index.html)
From here was the link that made me happy - the discovery of Native American Art/Iconography by Fr. John Giuliani!
(http://www.bridgebuilding.com/catalog/jg1.html) I have included 2 of my favourite images here.

As I looked at these beautiful images something from my early, formative past resonated with them in a way that hadn’t happened with the traditional icons. There was a real connection made that joined the circle of 26 years, uniting my present day experience with that of my childhood.

And I found myself worshipping a loving God who cares about us so much, he will work to find any way he can to connect with us, wherever we live, whatever culture we are part of – he will find a way. My challenge is to slow down & listen to him, to hear what he is saying to me here in Ealing, in this busy, bustling city. How is he trying to connect with me here? How is he trying to connect with you? How is he connecting us all together? How will he inspire us to make our own “icons” to worship him in our own cultural frame of reference here & now?
If he can come up with a bizarre chain of events like I just described, he can surely do anything! We just need to look & listen, engage & be present.

Written by Gwen Page

A Letter from God to Man

Fri, 30 Mar 2007 17:53:40 +0000

Last night I went to see Ben Westbeech play his new album live - simply amazing. However, equally as good was the support act - Dan Le Sac vs. Scroobius Pip. They have a single out on Monday which will make some noise - check out their page to listen to some of their stuff (myspace.com/lesacvspip.) Whilst the beats (from Dan Le Sac) were good, for me it was all about Scroobius Pip who was dropping his street poetry over the top.
One song that stood out for me is below - A letter from God to Man - at the end I went up and asked for a copy of the lyrics :)

I was going to change/re-edit them slightly but I think they say more like this. A reminder to fix up look sharp, a wake-up call, whatever- draw your own conclusions.

Letter from God to Man (Scroobius Pip)

Hey there.
How's it going?
Long
Time
No
See.
I know I haven't been around much but it didn't seem like you wanted me to be.

the last time I sent down a message, you nailed it to a cross.
So I figured I'd just leave you to it and be your own boss.

But I've been keeping an eye on you, I have. And it's amazing how you've grown.
All your technological advances and the problems you've overthrown.

All the beautiful art you've created with such grace and such finesse.
But I must admit there are a few things that, I'm afraid, Have impressed me less.

So I'm writing to apologise for all the horrors committed in my name.
Although it was never what I intended I feel I should take my share of the blame.

A lot of the good I tried to do was corrupted when organised religion got into full swing.
What I thought were quite clear messages were taken to unusual extremes.

My teachings were taken out of context to meet the agenda of others.
Interpretations were taken in many different ways and hidden meanings 'discovered.'

Religion became a tool for the weak to control the strong.
With all these new morals and ethics survival of the fittest was gone.

No longer could the biggest man simply take what ever he needed,
Because damnation was the price if certain rules were not heeded.

Some of the deeds committed in my name just make me wonder where I went wrong.
Back at the start when I 'created' all of this, the foundations seemed so strong.

See all the elements wee already here long before I began.
I just kind of put them all together. I didn't really think out a long term plan.

I made the sun an appropriate distance and laid the starts across the sky,
So you could navigate this globe or simply experience a sunrise.

I covered the earth with plants and fruits, some for sustenance and some for beauty.
And made the sun shine and clouds rain so that maintenance wasn't your duty.

I tried to give each creature its own attributes. But without making them enveloped.
I gave you all space to grow and, in your own way, space to develop.

I didn't know that such development would cause rifts and jealousy.
Cause you to war against each other and leave marks on this planet indelibly.

You see, I wasn't the creator, more the curator of nature.
And I want to set things straight with homosexuals right now; I DON'T hate ya.

I was a simple being that happened to be the first to yield such powers.
But I just laid the ground. It was you that built the towers.

It was you that invented bombs and fear that comes with them.
It was you that invented money, and corrupt economic systems.

You invented terms like 'just wars' and terms like 'friendly fire,'
And it was you that didn't know when to stop digging deeper and when to stop building higher.

It was you that exhausted the resources I carefully laid out on this earth,
And it was you that even saw these problems coming but accredited them little worth.

It was you that used my teachings for your own personal gain
And it was you that committed such tragedies, even if they were in my name.

So i apologise for any mistakes I made and for when my words were misconstrued,
But this apology is to Mother Nature because I created you.

easter journey

Thu, 29 Mar 2007 17:39:41 +0000

This may feel a few days early but getting in the mood for Easter week have a look at easter journey, 8 pictures by Luton young people, taking themes from the Easter story and applying it to their own lives and experiences. Powerful and striking.

spring cleaning

Wed, 28 Mar 2007 22:32:54 +0000

due to the activities of the landlord's builders in my flat, i am obliged to do a more thorough spring clean than i had intended. when there is plaster dust everywhere you have to be methodical, from the lampshades down. tonight i finally got the bedroom clean, safe enough to put on the new bedding that replaces the stuff torn and dirtied by the builder. at the weekend i'll sort out the living room, and then it'll be time to deal with the balcony, clean the furniture for the summer, get some bedding plants.

it's tedious to have this forced upon me, but there is some satisfaction in knowing that the neglected corners are clean, no more sense of lurking dirt that one can't face tackling this time [again]. this is probably the most lenten thing i'll do. the spiritual metaphors are all too clear - sometimes life events force an inner spring cleaning upon us, obliging us to deal with the dark corners and whatever hides there. lenten observances are meant to be a soul-clearing exercise, a rearranging of the furniture, a refocussing on what matters. we give things up to sharpen our attention, and maybe give some things up for good. if you had to give up something permanently for lent what would it be? what would you then give up next year? how long could this go on, and who would you become?

Too much stuff

Wed, 28 Mar 2007 07:31:09 +0000

My life in the last month has been dominated by stuff.

We have been going through the process of emptying my aunt's flat, she died at the end of January. So we have been trying to clear away stuff, clothes, furniture, shoes, photographs (zillions of them), endless letters and correspondence, linen, old articles, books which in various ways sum up not just a life, but a whole collection of lives - a whole community of friends, family, experiences lived across years, countries and worldviews. As we clear all way, we have to sort out what might be kept, what given away to friends and relatives, what might have value for the charity shops, what can be recycled, and what should just simply thrown away.

There is a combination of practical decisions, emotional memories. Some stuff carries little regret, other things can bring great sadness and recognition.

But the dominant thought, why is there so much and what is it for? How much do we really need? How many of my things could I clear away? What actually matters, how much use would it be? If somebody were to clear my stuff if I died, what would they think? And if it all disappeared in a puff of smoke, how much of it would be missed? Would I be happier with a fraction of it? Or nothing? How much is necessary? How much is enough for me? How much is too much?

Which bits are really important, give me identity and security, special memories, could be passed on to the next generation? How do I decide? My sister and I worked together, and sometimes another view would help, at other times not.

I have never been very into giving things up for Lent. But perhaps if I could reduce my stuff by at least a little fraction every Lent, every year, rather than accumulating, perhaps, just perhaps I would feel

freer, less preoccupied, more open to newness and growth.

With more understanding of what really matters, with space in my heart to receive and share God's love.

Commensality

Tue, 27 Mar 2007 15:51:36 +0000

Recently two people independently gave me copies of Lynne Truss’s book Talk to the Hand (subtitled “The utter bloody rudeness of everyday life”). And I’ve just started reading Michael Bywater’s Big Babies.

Once I’d got past the first worries (Two people have given me a book on manners – is it because they think I haven’t any? Or is my inner Daily Mail soul showing through?), I discovered that both of these are basically one-idea books; ‘Some People Are Getting Ruder’ and ‘We Are Being Infantilised’.

As I wasn’t around in the 1950’s I have no idea whether that era really did constitute a kind of Golden Age from which we have fallen. But from Mr Bywater I have learnt a lot of long words (solipsistic, apotropaic, anomie, diegesis...) including; commensality, which the free online dictionary (my own paper version doesn’t have such long words) defines as ‘Fellowship at table; the act or practice of eating at the same table’. He holds up commensality as the happiest of all the grown-up virtues, and here we are, approaching Maundy Thursday, the commemoration of the Last Supper. And I don’t know how to commemorate it, emotionally; the loving-generosity of the host and the betrayal by Judas. Which was more than just bad manners or infantilism. Part of me is a clown; if I can make enough people laugh everything will be all right again. But I can’t clown this away, so I’ll have to wait for Easter Sunday instead.

Preparing for Easter

Sun, 25 Mar 2007 10:11:25 +0000

We have just returned from a short holiday in Seville.

What has really struck us is the sense of preparation. The community is very much aware that Easter is coming. Stands are being set up so that people can watch street parades, workmen are working 24 hours a day to finish roadworks in the town centre and individuals are very much involved in their personal and corporate preparation.

All we seem to have are Easter Eggs